Settling the Whirlwind

Wow. What an absolute whirlwind the last 4 months have been, heck let's be real, the last 2.5 years have been. I finally am starting to feel like things are starting to mellow out.

Today, I received the results from yet another follow up MRI from all my drama back in February. This would be MRI #3 if you count the multiples I had during my first hospital stay as 1 (I think they ended up doing about 6 different series during that first round). The difference between the 3? Absolutely nothing. No change. That isn't a slight change or an insignificant change that is NO CHANGE.

Kind of amazing. (Thank you to all of you for helping make this happen with your support, positive thoughts and prayers.)

So this means my neurosurgeon officially said today he would call it a benign tumor. He threw some pretty big words around that I just couldn't wrap my brain (or brain tumor) around to remember but they referred to various benign and very mild tumors that could take many, many years to cause a significant problem, if ever. 

So I was told to come back next March and after that we would be looking at a 2 year break, possibly a 5 year break and then a "call me if something changes" break.

I just can't believe it. This day felt soooo far away back when I was focusing on being strong and the power of positive thinking. But I did it with an amazing support system and that raincoat of faith and here I sit, finally, blogging about the worst being behind us.

Our sweet Cooper has now had his adenoids removed (I may have forgotten to blog about that) and although we haven't seen a huge improvement, he definitely seems like he has more of his life back (as if the kid could get any more hyper) and Griffin is starting to meet his scheduled milestones, like holding his head up (better a little late than never) and his pediatrician is pretty confident he will catch up in no time. And now the cherry on our well deserved sundae is this news of my brain being okay.

It honestly still doesn't even feel real. Maybe because I worked so hard to logically process everything and focus on the things that made me happy, like the relationship that would bloom between Cooper and Griffin.

And it has. It is a beautiful, beautiful bond they have. The light on G's face when he hears C's voice for the first time each morning and the ginormous smile C has when he tickles G, oh man, it moves me to tears. Their bond actually deserves its on post starting from the moment they met in the NICU, but those moments are so worth every second of every awful moment that has occurred in the last 4 months and even the last 2.5 years. 

And once again, a tangible testament to add to my tool bag of tricks to hang next to my raincoat of faith to remember the answer when the going gets tough is always to focus on the good, the part I can control and let go of everything else. It really seems to be working and I am so thankful, so so SO thankful for every bit of this whirlwind that is finally settling down.