So when we made it to 12 weeks in Griffin's exclusively breastmilk diet were beyond proud. (As before, if you do not wish to read about nursing, stop reading now!)
Here we are another month later and still holding strong! There was about 10 days during month 3, I was one hungry baby cry away from going to Target to buy formula.
I hate pumping. Like despise it. It isn't painful, just really annoying. The majority of my job is working on projects, large projects that require lots of focus with lots of planning and lots of organization. Already the environment I am in has constant interruptions, and with my office off-site and my current driving situation (just one month left!!), it is hard to pull myself from my work to find a quiet place to pump that won't interrupt my focus and productivity.
Some mothers pump and get as much or more than what their baby would get if nursing. Sadly, I am not one of those. My body doesn't respond to the pump the way it does to my baby. I have to pump double the amount of times he feeds to keep up. So when he was eating 3 bottles at school, I was pumping 6 times. Usually one or 2 were at home in between feedings. I was starting to get sick of pumping around the clock, even when I was with my baby just to keep up. Enter the 3 month growth spurt and there went almost my entire freezer supply.
When I unfroze the last bag of freezer milk, I accepted the end was near. We had made it further than we ever expected and we would be proud of that. I told Rick I felt like this might be the end of our nursing relationship and he as supportive as ever, reminded me that Griffin would be just fine.
But for some reason, I just couldn't bring myself to let go. We had already made it this far!!I read the 3 month growth spurt is the hardest point and if you could get over that hump you would be golden and things get so much easier after that. I just wasn't ready to quit. So I ordered fenugreek, made myself drink the required 64oz of water a day, tried to stay busy during my pump breaks so I would stop stressing about how much was coming out (apparently that has a psychological effect on your let-down) and started nursing Griffin right before he went to class so he wouldn't need as much expressed milk. One week later, we were finally making it all work. The end didn't feel so near anymore. But, I was still only making enough to have a happy baby and get through day by day. I still wasn't able to put anything in the freezer.
We have our 5 year anniversary trip planned in August which means leaving the boys for 3 days, which means I need 3 days worth of milk in our freezer by August 15th. I decided if I had to supplement for a weekend, as disappointing as it would be, I would because this trip is that important to us.
Then something miraculous happened. Griffin slept through the night. SIX HOURS of uninterrupted sleep. And then he slept through another night this time SEVEN HOURS. Then another and another. One week later (which was last night he slept TEN HOURS! He is feeding before bed sometime between 730-830pm then not again until 530-6am. I have continued to pump before I go to bed sometime between 10/11 which is forcing me to take some time to myself and that milk goes straight to the freezer. It isn't much each day but we are getting there! I am hopeful we will have enough for our anniversary weekend.
The next growth spurt will result in cereal/baby food and then the start of weaning begins. I just can't believe it! I am feeling so elated we have made it this far but like everything else, so bittersweet our sweet baby boy is growing so fast. I am really growing to love my private time with Griffin now (which is sometimes propped up against a bathroom wall as if I am sitting in an imaginary chair), especially since it has opened my flexibility up be able to have mornings with my little dude.
I feel like we are (finally) past the worst of it and nursing is actually easier than bottle feeding. I am excited that Griffin won't be attached to the bottle like Cooper was (ugh, I cringe even thinking back to weaning Coop from the bottle). I am most excited we made it another month and if we make it to 12, that will be cool and if we don't, that will be okay, too.
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